Lindsay Gill: Chivalry is not dead...but it is in critical condition.

Wednesday, September 25, 2013

Chivalry is not dead...but it is in critical condition.

Today's post was inspired by two things:
1.  This post that my aunt J shared with me.
2.  Getting smacked by a door leaving a pizza shop with my hands full, while a man stood and watched.  I wish it was filmed for your enjoyment.

I started thinking that there are so many things I want my little Luke to know.  Of course, many he will have to learn on his own, and many will be learned the hard way.  I thought about making some artwork with a list of these things, or writing him a long letter.  Instead, I think we already have the best learning environment: he has a dad who exemplifies being a gentleman everyday.  But here's what I came up with, anyway:

1.  Hold the door.  Some women do not want the door held for them, and that is fine.  But in general, it is the respectful thing to hold the door for the person behind you.  If you see someone carrying a pizza and trying to leave the restaurant like a balancing act, offer to help.

2.  No swear words.  In college, in your man cave, you can use swear words.  But around family and friends, and women: no swearing!  It is not attractive.

3.  Say grace before meals.  This is something that we adopted from my husband's family.  It doesn't have to be a loud prayer with hand-holding and the works (like he does) but it can be a quiet "thank-you" for the food you're about to eat.

4.   Use manners.  Today I had a young patient who said please and thank-you.  They said "yes" instead of "yeah" (something I need to work on myself).  When I asked how he was, he reciprocated the question.  This patient really stood out!  I told his mother how polite he was and that it was a breath of fresh air in my day.

5.  Be brave.  We live in a world that can be scary.  Sometimes we fall down and get hurt.  But be brave, and know that we are here to help you and only want the best for you.  I had one patient a while back and when it was time for dilation drops, he looked at his mom.  She said "you are a lion! You are my brave lion!"  He took a deep breath, and leaned his head back for the eye drops.  This was such a unique thing to see, and I hope I can instill that bravery in my Luke.

6.  Dress up.  You don't have to be fancy.  But pull your pants up, and tie your shoes.  You will do better in school and at work when you feel your best.  Eat healthy.  You can have your treats but make sure you give your body the best chance at success.

7.  Don't bully anyone.  People are so fragile.  You do not know what others are going through.  You could be the smile that makes their day, or the frown that breaks their day.  Others may say mean things to you, let their words roll right off you.  You don't need their approval, you are wonderful.

8.  Save your money.  You might not need it now, but you will.

9.  Do your very best.  Give it your full effort.  You won't succeed in everything, but you won't know until you give it a try.

10.  We love you so much.  There are SO MANY people who love you so much!  You'll never know how much we love you.  We would do anything for you.  Please come to us if you need anything, and please ask us anything.  You're never alone.

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